Last week I took the last step and had my eyes fixed (I know...some would say vane, but if you knew how bad my vision was you'd say "about time").
As my prep nurse was explaining what would come next she handed me a hospital gown and hairnet, asked that I enter the wash room so I could thoroughly wash my face and put on the gown/hairnet. As I was closing the door she hastily said:
"You don't have to remove your clothes, you can put the gown on over your jeans."
I was astounded...I mean really, who would think that you need to be naked to have your eyes fixed? So I asked her after I "suited up", "do you get a lot of people stripping down?"
Long story short, she explained that they do a lot of surgeries for elderly patients and many times the whole hospital gown thing is routine for them.
"We see a lot of not so nice butts", one nurse said.
"Then again, it's not a failing of just the elderly, so sometimes we do see some nice ones" said another.
As I sat outside the surgical room awaiting the next steps in my prep I just couldn't believe that someone could be that conditioned, that things could be so rote in their lives that getting buck naked wasn't even questioned when the paper gown was offered (little did I know I'd be eating those sentiments in a few minutes...).
My next nurse came over (sweet as candy), put some drops in my eyes, explained how she was going to sterilize my eyelids and that I would have to not touch/rub them or we'd have to repeat the process.
So there I was, waiting to be called in, looking forward to being able to see clearly for the first time in 26 years when my eyes started to tear up. Ok, it wasn't bad at first, I can handle this...just don't rub your eyes Brian (I kept saying it...it wasn't true but I kept saying it).
Ten minutes go by, my eyes are tearing so bad it looks like I'm crying. Suddenly I hear my name called and the surgical nurse exclaim: "Are those drops making your eyes burn that bad...why didn't you say anything?"
"I thought it was part of the process so I figured I had to endure it. When the other nurse said to not rub my eyes I figured that since it was burning...that was the reason I was told to not rub."
Wow...here I was just a short while ago smugly wondering who the heck would meekly undress and put on a robe (because they are conditioned to) while I sit here and basically do the same thing by not questioning if my eyes were supposed to burn like hellfire.
Lessons are learned everyday (you just have to keep your "eye" out for them) and I learned one that day.
Yes sir, I like humble pie. Give me a huge slice (I think I deserve it)!
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